Candidates

John Moe at McSweeney's Internet Tendency identifies the pros and cons of the top 20 possible Republican candidates for President.

8.

NEWT GINGRICH

Pro: Well known.

Con: See above.

Of course, he also analyzes the Democratic candidates.

10.

JIMMY CARTER

Pro: Nobel Prize winner; available; just as good at not knowing what the hell to do about Iran as anyone else.

Con: Judging by photos, approximately 415 years old.

Candidacies by Zombie Ronald Reagan, Optimus Prime, Bigfoot, and you are also considered.