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30 September 2006

Apologetics

For those of you who say, “omnipotent, omniscient, omnibenevolent—choose two,” I say that I have a few hundred proofs of God's existence handy.

A few samples:

Argument from Lots of Books
  1. The Bible has lots of books written by lots of authors over a long period of time.
  2. Through centuries of vigorous apologetics we've been able to forge a more or less coherent plot for the whole Bible.
  3. It is beyond human ability for so many authors over so long a time to write so many books from which we could hammer such a plot.
  4. Therefore, God exists.
Argument from Troy
  1. There is little archeological evidence for the events in Exodus.
  2. But look at Troy! It is discovered when people thought the Iliad was only a story! So who knows if there would be a time evidence for Exodus was discovered?
  3. Therefore the Exodus actually happened.
  4. Therefore, God exists.
Pascal's Argument, aka Pascal's Wager
  1. If God exists, it would be really cool. (And I would win big-time.)
  2. If God didn't exist, it would really suck. (But I wouldn't lose much.)
  3. Therefore, God exists. (Or, at least I should believe in God because it's the best bet.)

My Thelemite readers may particularly enjoy proofs 241 and 242.

And mind you, most of these are arguments for a well-known flavour of Big Daddy God. Apply to Ha'shem, Ram, Ptah, Ahura Mazda, Thor, or the Flying Spaghetti Monster at your own risk.

1 comment:

  1. I was always a fan of the saying, "An all powerful, benevolent God doesn't seem to jibe with reality, but a God that is 100% Malevolent, but only 75% Effective seems to explain a lot"

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