Passionately snide

Yeah, I still haven't posted my long review of The Passion of the Christ. I'm working on it.

Fortunately for all you Passion fans, Orcinus has published a darkly funny email he received on the subject:

The film is only anti-Semitic if you consider it anti-Semitic to portray Jews as an unruly crowd of evil, hook-nosed Christ killers.

The main miracle in the life of Jesus is apparently the miraculous amount of blood that his body contains.
...
Jesus wears really heavy sandals. Because every time he puts his foot down, it is like Godzilla walking through Tokyo. Boom, Boom, Boom. They must weigh like a ton.

Plus, I've got a Mel Gibson screenplay generator handy, if you need one.